The Aging Process - Some Questions Answered

I was being amused the other day by following a FB exchange between a couple of former students of mine. The complaints revolved around sore backs, tired this and worn out that, and these kids are, well, just kids really. Youngsters. Still with lots of memory and drive, one would think. And they haven't passed the big four oh yet. So much to look forward to....

Not having finished the 6th decade myself just yet, I can't claim to be a complete expert on the subject, but I thought it worthwhile to share some insight into what's just over the horizon for these young whippersnappers in the belief that forewarned is forearmed. Or something like that. So, in no particular order....

The first thing I noticed happened many years ago, probably shortly after I turned 25. I realized that I wasn't able to stay up and party all night and head out on a long road trip the next day with a hangover. This was reinforced a few years later when I had a several-hour flight back home after significant party. Never again, I promised myself, and it was a promise I think I've managed to keep ever since. Life is tooooo short to feel that crappy.

Your eyesight will start to change, probably necessitating bi or tri-focals. With the new graduated lenses, you won't look like an old fogie, but YOU will notice. You may not be able to read with your glasses on, close work may be difficult, especially in low light situations. Personally, I have a large magnifier light at my workbench and it gets lots of use. You will also find that you can't stand bright sunshine without "shades" and a hat. Never used to bother me, but now....?

Your hearing acuity will likely decrease, especially if you're a male. This has both benefits and disadvantages which I will leave for you to discover.

You may find that you can't sleep as well. In fact, you may find yourself awake for 2 or 3 hours each night, this after falling asleep exhausted in the middle of a good book at 9 pm. Did I mention that late nights will probably become impossible? I've been known to nod off at any time after 8:30 pm. Is this the outcome of a low-stress lifestyle? Who knows, but my iPod gets much late-night use and I'm often awake, for the day, at 4 or 5 am. Sigh.

A related sleep issue seems to be connected to bathroom breaks, usually several of them, interspersed throughout the night. Your only solution seems to be semi-dehydration, otherwise, you kidneys have waaaay too much to do. If I'm at a backcountry hut or a hostel, I have to insist on a lower bunk near the door to facilitate my late-night excursions.

I've always been a list-maker, that being the only technique guaranteeing I'd be able to remember what jobs needed to be done. Develop this technique, because you will start to think you've lost your mind as you get older. That's probably slowly becoming true. The number of times I've gone to another part of the house (or to town) and been unable to recall why I was there.... Lists are the solution. Keep a clipboard handy. It's true what they say: "the mind goes first...".

You will develop more and more aches and pains, not all of them caused by your kids/spouse/job/government. Get used to it. Warm up gradually each day. Don't just charge off wildly into your work. Get a family doctor and make sure you find one who doesn't have a problem prescribing non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs. I can supply a list on request. Convince yourself that the saying "Better living through Chemistry" is really true. Make sure your medical plan covers physiotherapist's services. Find a doctor and a physio who aren't going to tell you that just because you're over 45/50/55 that you have to scale back your activities to match your age. With all your other "issues", you don't need condescension to add to your humiliation.

Speaking of medical issues, if you're a guy, there will be age-related "tests" that your doctor will want to perform. Tests you never dreamed of when you were younger. Tests I won't mention here but will leave to your imagination. If you're a gal, you probably won't have much sympathy for guys on this one.

Well, that's a start. I can revisit this topic occasionally, as there are issues I haven't even touched yet, like lowered metabolic rate (meaning you can't eat as much as you'd like unless blimp is a word you want applied to your shape), sex drive (meh), ambition (who cares) and a possibility that you will start to like country music (arrrrgh). I haven't taken up golf, or shuffleboard, or cards, but I suppose I shouldn't rule them out, yet.